I have been non-existent on my blog. I haven’t written anything new since August 17th. Part of this is because I was working on my Yahoo! Contributor profile and also because I have been in a massive rut (likely diagnosed as an extreme Depressive Disorder). I hit rock bottom about four weeks go and had delusions that suicide was the proper way to cope with my mental maladies.
I avoided the suicidal thoughts and made a trip to my psychiatrist. She gave me a pair of options: Commit myself to a psyche ward or attend Intensive Outpatient Therapy. I didn’t want to be committed again. Partially out of embarrassment and partially out of fear. I have no idea why I was scared, I had been committed before, but I couldn’t shake the fear. Maybe it is because I will always associate mental 
health facilities with One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest. I realize that this stereotype is not accurate, I know it from personal experience.
When I was at the ward two-years ago it was a good experience and I was better from it. After they release you from the mental health facility they offer therapy. IOP is three times a week and three hours per session. It is group therapy and very similar to the meetings that Edward Norton’s character in Fight Club attended. For me, IOP works and I excel in a group setting. I feel comfortable around people who have similar experiences and are trying to get better.
So for the time being I will be doing my best to get my head on straight. Posts will come intermittently as I also try to work through a bad case of writer’s block.